What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney Loves you.

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A baby crawls into a bar. He cannot walk.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Potatoes. Potatoes who? Garlic salt.

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Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

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Why did the police officer arrest the baseball player? He raped and murdered a thirteen year old girl.

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theres a mexican, an asian, and an american in a plane, they're about to crash, so they all have to throw out something they have a lot of in their country. The Mexican throws out beans, and says "I have to many of these in my country." The Asian throws out rice and says "i have to many of these in my country." The American throws out the Mexican and says "I have to many of these in my country."

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

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Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

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Knock knock Who's there Police, there's been an accident Oh really? Know i'm actually a serial rapist and i have a gun so open up

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what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

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What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

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What's worse than a necrophobiac in a morgue? A necrophiliac. What's worse than a necrophiliac in a morgue? Seeing your family hacked to death by an evil axe murderer.

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? An egg.

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abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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I'm going to rewrite history. History.

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Nathan likes butt games with African American men

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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