Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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Whats worse then getting AIDS Math class

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Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

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Jimmy can't drive the tractor. Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he's a patato

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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What's black and breaks your stove when falling from a tree? Your stove

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

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So two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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How do you kill a diabetic? Take away their insuline

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I was walking down a railway line the other day... I was fined £1000

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Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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A Jew, Catholic, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The Jew leaves first for an unrelated reason.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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What the difference between a mexican family and a bench? The bench can support the family

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That's about as suspicious as a nun doing squats in a cucumber field.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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