What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

Pain is temporary. However, the scars from 3rd degree burns are forever.

a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

what's better than winning the special olympics?.. Not being retarded

What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

What do you call two gay guys? People who should be living in California.

knock knock whos there? yo mama yo mama who? yo mamas mama!!

How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? I like guys... cause I'm gay.

Why was the black racist guy and the white racist guy, who 0hated each other, afraid of Michael Jackson? They didn't want to be the other each others color.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

Why did i write this joke? Because i'm a try hard.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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