Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

What's the difference between Miley Cyrus and a dead baby? One is a popular singer and the other is a dead baby.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the Muslim do on 911? He weeped for the loss of his many good friends and relatives

Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

How did the girl cross the road? --she didn't, she died trying because she was blind and didn't see the sign that said "Don't Walk"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax.

Once upon a time there was a magical duck in a magical kingdom. Nothing interesting ever happened to it and it was eaten by a magical fox.

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

Click here for free sandwich.

CFL

A miserable man committed suicide.

What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

What is the difference between a bear and berries? No idea? You better stay out of the forest...

This is the funniest joke in the world: Just joking!

What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Have you seen Jamal's socks?

What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

whats worse than death getting your nuts ripped of by a rabid racoon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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