Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

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a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench. The bucket.

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What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

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What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

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Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

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Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

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your momma so stupid she dropped out of high school

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I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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