What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

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You know whats funny? Women's rights

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

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Why was Mary's phone call suddenly disconnected? She was raped.

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Philosoraptor, turds IM A SPAMBOTz B=Not really, just blind.

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

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What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

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A man walks into a bar He drinks the night away with his friends *Plot Twist* It was a dream He has no friends.

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What do you call an Amerindian who finished medical school? A doctor.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

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What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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Women's rights

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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why did bill gates sue his banks? Because he can

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops