Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Q: Why can't sally play on the swing? A: Because she has no arms Q: Who was the first to climb mount everest? A: Not Sally

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a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? -She had no arms *Knock Knock* Who's there? -Not Sara!

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What's brown and sticky? My ass.

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What is Green and smells like Yellow Paint Green Paint

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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What can little Billy play? The tumour, sorry I meant what will little Billy die from.

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Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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What is the key to a good anti-joke? A disappointing or intellectual punch-line said in a calm and passive tone.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Did you see the game yesterday?

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A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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America. A land where if a girl sexual harrasses a guy would be a good thing.

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How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

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Peter was sitting on a bench. He had a bag of 10 sweets and was eating them slowly. John and Anthony both wanted some, but Peter wanted to still have sweets left over. How many did he give them both? None. He's that selfish.

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Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

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where did little suzie go during 9/11 EVERYWHERE...

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A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

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What's worse than a shotgoun to the balls? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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