A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" asks the bartender. "I want six shots of whisky," responds the young man. "Six shots? What’s the occasion?" asks the barman. "My first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you a seventh on the house." To which the young man replies, "No offence sir, but if six shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."

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what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

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What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

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this new cologne, it's kind of gross smelling.

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Ha! You're so gay that I respect the sexuality you were born with and I feel completely comfortable with, and happy for, you and your preferences.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Whats green and smells like ass? My ass. I lied about the green..

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

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What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

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Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

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5 Jewish men walk into a bar and are expected to be treated nicely

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What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

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What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

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Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

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Kys

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Things i like to do when im bored; chase after ostriches take major dumps masturbate give myself major erections EJ

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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Aodhan, Kevin, Taggart and Caoimhin walk into a bar. They have drinks and then leave.

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Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

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Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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Why did the man turn up at his friend's funeral dressed as Mickey Mouse? Because it would have been disrespectful not to attend.

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Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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