How do you make an idiot in suspense?

what do asians do in asian history month, nothing, it does not exist, hahaha

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? The Holocaust

Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

Q:what do you do when a black guy is drowning A:you dont

What do you call 100 black men at the bottom of the ocean? A scuba group because during these hot summer months they like to cool off and go scuba diving.

Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

Why couldn't the young african american read? He was born blind

It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.

What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

Charles Manson is innocent.

a young boy once lost his mind and then his parents weeped because their son had been decapatated in a horrible motorcycle accident caused by a drunk who had just killed his wife and children and was running from the cops....

There is a young boy called Clive, and his dad asks him what he wants for his birthday: "I would like one yellow golf ball please dad" he said. Of course, his father was quite surprised by his son's request, but nevertheless, he got him a yellow golf ball for his birthday. A few years later, clive does amazingly well at school and gets all As in his final exams. Filled with pride and love for his son, his father says to him: "I can't begin to tell you how proud i am of you, Clive. In fact, you can have a preasant! What do you want?" Clive thinks for a moment. "i would like one hundred yellow golf balls please!" His father was a bit annoyed at his strange request, but neverrtheless, gave Clive his yellow golf balls. A few years later, Clive wins the gold medal at the olymics for the 100m sprint. His father is very proud: "Son, i am so happy about the way you've turned out. You make me so proud. Is there anything you want me to do for you?" "can i have 1000 yellow golf balls please" Now his father got annoyed, he thought Clive was taking the piss. Eventually though, he calmed down and got clove the golf balls. Unfortunatley, Clive gets diagnosed with a deadly disease. His father is heartbroken. And as clive is lying on the hospital bed, his father moves close and speaks to him. "Son" he said, tears welling up in his eyes, "I just want to ask you one thing." "Ok," Clive said, as he too started to get emotional. "Why on earth did you want all those golf balls?" Clive looked deep into his father's eyes, as he took his last breath said: "I wanted them because- ack -splutter- ack" And he died.

Yo momma so fat she ate a tape worm which had to be surgically removed because it further increased her health problems. She's still fat.

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

Knock knock! Who's there? IT DOESN'T MATTER, YOU'RE NOT COMING TO MY HOUSE!!!! *closes door*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...