hi

Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

do yo know what's funnier than getting on a hidden camera show? Nope! it's just chuck testa

Your ancestors called. They want their glasses back!

What did the atheist say to the jew. Well first they had a long discussion about religion and the jew was actually made an atheist. Truly the work of God.

hey bruno ta quoi ds ta boite a lunch aujourdhui? DU SABLE CRISS DE POVRE!

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Why did the dog cross the road? Because the pizza man saw how hungry he was and left a pizza for the dog. So when the dog saw the pizza he went to go get the pizza, because he was hungry. In hindsight the moral of the story is: if you ever see a hungry dog on the other side of the road, become a pizza man (if you aren't already) and give him a pizza.

A man walks into an airport. He is sexually taken advantage of by TSA employees and suffers from severe depression for years after, eventually becoming gay and divorcing his wife. He then goes on a quest to discover the name of the man who took advantage of him. Once found, the man kills the employee and his family, commits acts of necrophilia upon his corpse in a slightly erotic display of revenge and stalks airports for the rest of his life, fruitlessly attempting to quench an insatiable bloodthirst for TSA workers.

What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing. The ocean is inanimate and therefore incapable of speech.

A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

What's worse than getting struck by lightning? Getting struck while your in your house!!

why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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