Penis

Julian Ha.

patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

guess what>? your mum lol

blonde: your cute Gangster: wanna go back to my crib blonde: you mean you can go back in time?

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

WILLY

Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

There are two muffins sitting in an oven, one muffin says to the other; boy it's hot in here. the other other muffin doesn't reply because it's a muffin, muffins don't talk. Now consider that the first muffin was a squirrel, A TALKING SQUIRREL!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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