Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

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an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

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two snow men standing in a field and one says to the other can you smell carrots

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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Womens rights.

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Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

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You will not press the like button.

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What did the man order at KFC, in Miami? A face.

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why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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what did the man say to the sad woman? go make ma a sammich before i hit you again! the women refused and was hit again.

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Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

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What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

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SHUT UP, yes you... WHAT DID I JUST SAY!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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