What's worse than a joke An ANTIJOKE!

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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What's worse than having a spiked club shoved up your butthole? Not much.

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Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

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Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

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If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

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How you know that you are flying with a "no frills" airline? There are no meals or films provided, no orange juice to drink during ascent and descent and no mid-flight shop service.

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What's worse than a broken leg? Two broken legs

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what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

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A White, a Mexican, and a Chinese guy all take a boat to go exploring.

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a man walks into a bar, he tells the bartender "im not a part of this SYSTEM"

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

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what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

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A amazing I idiots D discover S sex

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

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I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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