Roses are red Violets are blue Your grandpa's dead So are you.

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Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

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What do you call a penguin that hangs around in playgrounds? A paedophile.

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Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your wife has been killed in a car accident.

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If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

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A panhandler came up to me today and said he hadn't had a bite in weeks, so I gave him some change.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

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What's worse than a joke. ONE TOLD BY FOK.

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What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

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what do you call obama a dumbass

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what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What do you call someone who copies a previously posted anti-joke without doing any research to see if it has been posted before? a lazy good for nothing rectum licking testicle sucking gonad gobbling arse bandit with narcissism issues

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Chuck Norris has appeared in several action films.

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What's funnier than a fat person falling nothing is

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What do you call it one an Arab and a Jew get married? Love.

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''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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