What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

what do you order when it's a sunday in nyc during a solar eclipse on a leap year past 12:00 pm? what ever you like

Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. He later goes home drunk and beats his wife. His wife is getting a divorce.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

A young woman goes to a wild, infamous nightclub, all alone. She arrives safely at home a few hours later.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

why was 6 afraid of 7? because he raped her

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I am blind

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

roses are red grass is green your little ugly a*s makes me wanna scream

Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

Connor is homosexuaI

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

Two guys walk into a bar, and they ordered two drinks. Then the bartender said, "Two dollars, please." - Brandie PANG

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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