A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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What did the paraplegic boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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Whats the differnce betwwen a Wheelbarrow and a sack of dead babies The wheelbarrow is not in my garage

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what is not funny? This joke.

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. ~Stevie Wonder

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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Q: What do African Americans and Doorknobs have in common? A: Before the Emancipation Proclamation was passed, neither was free. Doorknobs still aren't free.

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your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

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what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Your moms so fat She should get some help because there's nothing good about being fat

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Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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