What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

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Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

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What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

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What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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you momas so fat, you momas so ugly Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great Salvador Dali mistook them for cloth.

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Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

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A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

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what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

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knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

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It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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