what's the black mans shirt made out of? cotton

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender doesnt serve her because she is 12.

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Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

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I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

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Who you gonna call? Gobstoppers

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What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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What is Green and smells like Yellow Paint Green Paint

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John has 37 candy bars and eats 36 of them? What does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

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The government

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Enters password. Sorry your password must contain the entire alphabet, your left foot, a theme song to a television show, and the blood of your enemies. Enters password. Password Strength: Weak

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A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on its sex. Females weigh 150-250kg, and males weigh upwards of 350kg.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

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The early bird gets the worm. The rest of them die of starvation.

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How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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What do you call a panda without a head? Dead.

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops