Roses are red, But ravens are black, Please go to China, and never come back!

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay I have knock knock joke but u have to start it. Okay Knock knock Who's there (akward silence)

If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

Dig a big hole in your front yard and wait next to it so when people walk by they'll ask "Why is there a hole in your front yard?" to whcih you will reply "I don't know. Do you wanna play Monopoly?"

"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

What did the man who brutally raped and murdered his infant daughter say? He didn't.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

- What would you say if you'll see a Mexican eating hamburger in fast-food restaurant? - Enjoy your meal.

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

A young cow died of terminal cancer; he said moo before he died

Do you want to hear a shit joke? Stuart.

If you go to a restaurant and you have more food on your plate then someone who is obese, you KNOW you have too much food.

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

make me a sandwich! what kind?

Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

Q) What is the difference between an elephant and a toaster? A) Do you seriously not know the difference between an elephant... and a toaster?

Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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