ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being chased by a wolf, who promptly ate the chicken when they arrived at the other side.

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a lightbulb One because lawyers are usually well educated and know how to screw in a lightbulb

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

Irish sobriety

sweating like antoni with a girl

Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

What's worse than the Holocaust? • • • Stubbing your toe.

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

A man with a blue house wears a blue shirt and wears blue jeans. Someone from a red house with a red shirt knocks on his door. He is invited in because they are friends and both have a wonderful time.

Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

stephen hawking walks into a bar, and those who recognize him are shocked that he's no longer in his wheelchair, and approach him to let him know this, but it turns out they were wrong, it was just a man with similar facial features to stephen hawking.

Q: y does obama keep raising gas prices A: he dosent want anyone to be able to drive to the poles in november

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

a little violence in a relationship doesn't hurt anybody

What do you call a deer with no eyes? It doesn't really matter but I wouldn't actually call anything because they have very sensitive hearing and will probably panic and, being blind, might collide with a tree.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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