knock knock whos there guy with a gun guy with a gun who guy with a gun who just shot you dammit

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Wheres my hood? Behind your neck.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

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What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

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Why did the woman say ow? She was shot in the foot

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What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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My mom told me I was pretty, I know now that she is a liar.

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Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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Ask me if I'm a dinosaur. Are you dinosaur? No.

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What's your star sign? Cancer. Oh you're gonna die. AWKWARD.

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What is more addictive than World Of Warcraft? Heroin

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What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

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what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

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What did the man say when he saw a giant herd of elephants coming? "Look! There's a giant herd of elephants coming!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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