Your Mother

why'd my house get destroyed I was afraid the tornado that hit mass was going to destroy it so I blew it up

How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

what did the little boy say when the teacher asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

What did Helen Keller say when she jumped off the cliff? ........………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………..................................................................... .

what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

So, as everyone knows, two different species (flavors) of cheerios cannot mate, right (common knowledge)? That is, if one is honey-nut and another is blueberry, they cannot mate. Anyway, there is this one normal cheerio that is in love with a blueberry cheerio. Unfortunately, he cannot mate with her. He can't even communicate with her because they are of different species. So, he invents a machine that changes all of his CNA (Cheerio DNA) into whichever type of cheerio that he wants. However, this machine performs a process that is extraordinarily painful, because that sort of thing would hurt. Anyway. He does it, and the normal flavored cheerio becomes a blueberry cheerio. Unfortunately, this girl cheerio hates him so much that she invents an identical machine and does the process on herself in order to become a cinnamon-apple cheerio, just so she can avoid this creeper. So, she does it. The boy cheerio is starting to get upset at this because he really wants her. So he tells himself that he will go through the pain for her, and becomes a cinnamon-apple cheerio. She then changes to a honey-nut cheerio! He decides that this is the last time that he will change cheerio type. He does it, and she changes one more time, into a normal cheerio - the kind he originally was. So he says out loud, "Okay, this is really the last time. If she changes again, I will just stay back with my family." So he becomes a normal cheerio again, and she doesn't change fast enough for him to put his moves on her. So, they start dating, and he finally asks her to the Formal Bowl (ahaha, get it, bowl instead of ball). Anyway, they get there and dance intensely for a few hours. They do all different kinds of dances. They do the tango, which was not very good. Also, they square dance, like rednecks. Finally, they get tired and she sends the boy cheerio to the milk bowl (you know, since it's a cereal dance, they have that and punch). He gets there and stands in line for ten minutes. Finally fed up at the really long line, he looks over at the bowl of punch and realizes there is no punch line.

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Some wild chickens have regular seasonal migration patterns that might require them to cross a road while traveling south. Wild chicken movements include those made in response to changes in food availability, habitat or weather.

Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

What is blue? The sky! Hahaha best joke to laught at with all of your buds hehehehehee

I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

What do you do when a taco eater gives you guacamole? Thank him, and politely smash it in the face of the nearest trashy tourist.

A lion, a tiger, and a bear walk down the side of the road. This is what I observed last week in a suburb of Columbus, Ohio.

A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Jokes related to finding a worm in an apple.

Why'd the dead man cross the road? He didn't, he was dead, therefore incapable of doing anything at all.

Your mom is so fat that I worry she may develop diabetes.

You know what the Germans have to say about problems? For every problem there is a final solution.

your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

whats black and large -me

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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