Q:How do u kill a butcher A: Kill its family

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja

Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

what do you call a unicorn crossing a bridge? nothing there fake

Q: What is worse than a dead baby in a trashcan? A: A dead baby in 10 trashcans.

What's brown and sticky? Anal

In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips and falls violently.

Im sorry Dylan Hodge Jamie Stegman

Why did the skeleton cross the street. He didn't.

What did I wake upto this morning that was white , cold and 2 inches deep? My tiny flaccid penis.

what do you call a jew hanging from a tree? dead

A blond walks into McDonalds. She orders and leaves.

How do you make a japanese man horny? Mutilate his girlfriend

knock, knock whos there child molestor

How do you get a single-armed monkey down from a tree? Wave.

Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

A duck walks ino a bar...... f*ck this sh*t im going to candy land.

The WNBA

What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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