How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

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What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

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A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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Why did the little boy fall down? Be he had the downs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

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What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?

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What did the man say to his doctor?

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Why do I write Anit-jokes. Because I'm very bad at delevering good punchlines. They generally fall flat.

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What happens when a Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. He gets a broken nose.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - To rape you. Knock Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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What's better than winning the lottery? Winnig the lottery twice.

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how do you break up with your girlfriend? talk about their race.

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A little boy walks up to his father and asks him a question, "Daddy, how are babies born?" His father then replies in an enthusiastic manner, "You see, I stuck my dick in your mom's vag and started pounding. Apparently two condoms defeat the purpose."

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What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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How do you sneak Jews across the border? In an ashtray.

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what did the man living in the box buy with his new found money? A bigger box.

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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