- Anti Joke

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 took sexual advantage of 9.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a mustang? I dont have a mustang in my garage.

Her tits are so big that they would provide adequate nourishment for any future offspring.

What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

how does a chinese chick check if she's pregnant? swallows a rubix cube and if it comes out solved shes pregnant

a guy named bob likes sprinkles on his ice cream.

Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

What should you do if you are being chased by a black man. keep running and if he tag's you, then you should try tag him back since this is a simple game of tag.

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What is the best part about being in bed with twenty eight year olds? There are twenty of them

Knock, Knock Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

A psychotic man steals a Police Officer's handgun, the man runs down the street. What happened? He fell in a hole and died.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist -Tag

I just got robbed by an invisible man!!!!

roses are red and violets are in fact violet

knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

What do you call a gay dinosaur? Nothing, they're extinct.

What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting constantly tortured for hours non-stop by getting your eyebrows plucked out one by one and getting your teeth pulled out and getting your arms cut open by a razor and getting your nose twisted off and getting your nipples ripped off by a pair of pliers and getting your toenails scraped off by a knife and getting a needle shoved into your eyes and getting a sword stuffed up your arse and getting your penis split in two like a hotdog and getting your balls smashed up by a sledgehammer so the sperm inside goes everywhere. I think that would be worse than dropping a dollar down the drain.

A man wakes up in the hospital after being in a car accident. He begins to yell "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor hurries into the room to find out why the patient is yelling. The doctor then promptly explains that this was due to the crash severing his spinal cord and rendering him paraplegic for the rest of his life. The doctor after explaining this states he'll never walk again, before leaving the patient's room.

A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

Knock knock Get off my porch homo

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Roses are red. Violets are purple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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