To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

There was a brunette, a blonde and a red head, They were all great friends!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

So a man and a woman are siting at the same park table Woman: sir are you touching my leg erotically Man: No mam for you see I am a parapaligec

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

There's 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving. Probably one of the 2 men.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

the joke below will not be as funny as this one.... hahaha other joke i just ruined you

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can walk wherever the hell they want. Leave them alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Who are doctors and literally are porn stars

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Womans baksetball...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what did the girl say when she lost her shoe where is my shoe

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why haven't any women go to the moon? Cause it still doesn't need cleaning.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

anti jokes are gay...your all gay

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Did you hear about the human cannonball who lost his job? Circus attendance is on the decline, as people are spending less money on entertainment, due to a slow economy and poor consumer confidence. Because the circus owners paid him under the table, he did not qualify for unemployment and was force to take a job at Hardies. He has a drinking problem and suffers from depression.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops