What did grandma get little Benjamin for Christmas? Nothing, she died last year

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident.

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How many kids does Buzz Light Year have? To infinity and beyond!!

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Where do babies come from? My sex dungeon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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What did the fish say when it hit the big stone wall? DAM

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A bear walks into a bar. Animal control was contacted and the bar was evacuated.

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A man saw a dinosaur yesterday. He had a very nice time at the museum.

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Knock, Knock Who's There A dyslexic kid with aides

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Is it normal to eat breakfastr in the morning? Yes By Logan in South Dakota

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Your mom is so fat that when she wears a yellow raincoat outside, people notice a rather large woman who is enjoying the weather and wearing a yellow raincoat.

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What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

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What's the difference between Josef fritsal and a fridge? A fridge can be thrown at a bowl of custard.

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A black person tans and starts to peel, what do you get? A white person.

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What do call a someone with no arms, legs, and has an eye patch? Names

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell into a well? Nothing. She died upon impact and her family mourned her death for years.

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favourite colour? Doesn't matter. He's dead.

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Robin, get in the batmobile

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What do you call 100 Americans at the bottom of the ocean? A US submarine crew.

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What does a muslim do on a plane? Flies to his intended destination without causing a problem.

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why did the baby have a hole in its head? it was shot

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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-what does burglars afraid of? -cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops