What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

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What did the prostitute say to the pimp? Can I have $50? She was found three minutes later beaten to death with a purple cane, and had many imprssions of rings in her skull

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Q: A plane crashes on the boarder of Mexico and America, where do you bury the survivors. A: You don't because there were none, everyone fucking died!

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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A sober Irish individual.

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Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left his fence open and the chicken happened to cross a road.

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I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

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How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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What goes 100 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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how do you get blondes to drown? stick a mirror to the bottom of the pool

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CHORGLUND

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What's the difference between a raccoon and a bear? One's a raccoon, the other's a bear.

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Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

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What's round and orangey? An orange.

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A Jew walks on his way to work. He does not notice the quarter lying on the sidewalk and did not care for the dollar lying on the other side of the road.

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What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops