You and your parents are going to die today

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what's mouthwatering and smells like fish? salmon

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Why did Elliot Spitzer cross the road? To go have sex with a hooker.

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What do you call a Ku Klux Klan member who has been set on fire? Burnt Marshmallow.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one being irish and the other chinese. now they both happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china, where as the chinese man had not committed any crime.

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How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

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Why couldn't the blonde make ice cubes? Because recently she has been missing payments on the elictric bill because of economic hardships.

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

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Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

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Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

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68

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

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What's worse than a baby in a trash can The holocaust

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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Yo momma's so ugly. Most people do not enjoy looking at her

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

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why did the zombie eat bob because bob was delicious

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Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

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Why did the man stop eating? Because he took an arrow to the knee.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops