What amusing anecdote did the Department of Educational Dictations officer tell his coworker? There was no amusing anecdote. DED men tell no tales.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

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why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

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What is black and hanging from the tree in my back yard? A tire Swing.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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Why did the man staple his own scrotum to his left thigh? He didn't. His friends did.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

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How many hookers fit in your bed? 12, if you have a king-sized bed, and 8.7 if you have a queen-sized bed.

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You: Ask me if I like lasagna. Them: Do you like lasagna? You: No.

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Why Russians ride bears? Because god hate bears

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What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

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Two apples are hanging from a tree. They are both picked, sold, taken home, washed, and enjoyed by a family of three.

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What did the Pope say to the homosexual couple? Welcome to the community.

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An American, an Indian and an African walked into a bar. They had a memorable time together.

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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3 guys walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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i keep getting thumbs down...

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Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

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What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

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Q: yugdyijgdripgdghd A: sorry I'm retarted. I don't know wtf I'm doin

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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