So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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carn ehney bodie hellp mie with mine smellings?

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every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute goes by.

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whats the difference between a bird and a turtle? they can both fly but the turtle cant

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Pizza hut delivery service, here's your pizza, Thanks.

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Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

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What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

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Whats the difference between a baby and my freezer? I don't stick my meat in the freezer!

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Im cute hehehee

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I was strolling along the countryside and saw 2 niiggers peacefully hanging from a tree

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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Guess what? AIDS!

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"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

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What is green fuzzy and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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