How do you become a multi-trilionere? Get bored...

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's blind.

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why is georgia shit at making jokes i dont know

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How do you get a girl out of a tree? You throw a refrigirator at her.

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The awkward when you didn't actually say moment.

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What's worse than finding half of a worm in an apple? a razorblade.

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Why did a little kid have a long face Because his face was stretched out by a truck wheel

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STFU Stop Tickling Fuzzy Unicorns they really don't like it

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whats the difference between a white jew and a black jew the black jew is treated poorly and is sent to the back of the gas chamber

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Whats the difference between a field of corn and a dead body? The field of corn wasn't killed by severe blood loss and hemorrhaging after it was stabbed in the back, stomach and abdomen 27 times in 1987, where the escaped convicted serial killer buried it beside a river in Northern Dakota.

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what do u call a man being beaten in the street the cops

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Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she was a woman.

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A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

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Why did the baby boy start crying? He got hit with a toaster

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Yo mammals so stupid, she's got AIDS!

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Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

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Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

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What made Qtip's so dangerous? Q-tip's music

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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