A man walks into a bar. He says "ouch".

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Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? Because she didn’t have any arms. like your mom

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What did the orange say to the apple? Nothing, fruits can't talk.

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Knock knock Who's there? A pedofile, get in the van Ok

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What's black and red and on the ground? A dead black guy.

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

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Dan was friends with Dick. Dick likes to give massages to Dan. Dan's favorite is Dickie's special mixture. He will remember Dick, his favorite personal assisatant for life. CREEPER

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Richard Nixon walks into a bar. Everyone is thrilled to meet a former President of the United States who returned from the grave.

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a car? A: 5 in a standard mid sized sedan, or 7 in an SUV

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ur gey

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What do a boat and a computer have in common? Nothing

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

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Q: What Would Canada Be With out Nature A: Peru

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The guys Joke above me is funnier^.

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Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

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two snow men standing in a field and one says to the other can you smell carrots

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Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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everyone lies especially if they said agree to terms of service

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because six is a numerophobe.

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Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

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OMG, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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