Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could be slaughtered and eaten for dinner.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She was dead

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Yo mama so fat she went on a diet and steadily lost wait

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What did the blonde do when she reached the traffic lights? She stopped, as the lights were red.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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Two carnivorous dinosaurs get into a fight. Carnage ensues and many baby dinosaur eggs are stomped on, and in the end they both die.

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Penis

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What did one homo-sexual say to his four homo-sexual friends? Were One Direction!!

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rarw

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What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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a man and a boy walk into a dark scary wood. "gosh I'm spooked" exclaimed the boy. "you think you've got it bad?" said the man "I'm walking out of here alone"

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EGGPLANT

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What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

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Steven and Daniel are playing with super soakers in the back yard. Steven says to Daniel: "You can't squirt me!" Daniel says to Steven: "Yes I can!" Daniel is HIV positive.

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A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

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What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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Why does Jordan Abu aita have a small pepe? Because he is black

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a donkey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops