What was the only animal to not board the ark in pairs? Loads of animals because it didn't happen.

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i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into a worm and finding an apple in it.

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Why can't Kim and Arnold get childern ? because they are 2 stones.

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When life gives you carrots, don't make carrot juice, because it's gross.

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what do you call a mexican whos lost his car? nothing, nick ate him

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

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why did the panda and puppy get into a fight? how should i know, you tell me.

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If you see a fat man, what do you say to him? Hopefully nothing mean, seeing as that would be demoralizing to the fat man.

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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A squirrel is about to steal the eggs of a sparrow when the sparrow suddenly says, "Stop! I will do anything if you would spare my eggs!" The squirrel has no capacity to reason and so steals the eggs anyway. The sparrow is devastated.

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Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

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Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

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The Big Bang Theory (the show).

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Hellen Keller went to town a ridin on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it.. ashhlerthurbujahustar.

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White boy in jail. "That ish crazy!!"

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Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

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What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? this overused joke

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Q:If Ryan Vallee walks into a room what do you do? A:Walk out -Ryan V

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Why did the little boy want to sleep with his parents in their bed on the only night in weeks they'd planned to have sex? His bedroom was on fire.

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There was an Englishman a Welshman and a Scotsman, all of whom were nationals of the United Kingdom.

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What did the fat man say when he was offered infinite french fries for life? Yes.

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all hail based mark

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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