I walked into temptation yesterday, He said hi.

Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer..... Just Kidding! He got a bike!

Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

Take one: "What kind of assho... Take two "What kind of awesome people with no dignit..." Take three: "What kind of awesome people with most dignified self image would use this piece of shit s... Final take What kind of awesome people with most dinified self image would use this RETARDED PIECE OF MOLTEN SHlT SITE FROM FUCKING HELL?" Moral: "Technically I do not use it, I abuse it just like I did your mom... Hey, I am your dad by the way, that gives me the right to rape you whenever I want" NeroMetal I once fisted a velociraptor to death (I do not mean punching it in the face here if you think thats something), but that's not metal... I cant for the fuck bother to find out how to spell the fucking dinosaurs name... Now that is metal...

Knock knock. Who's there? Meals on wheels - eat up!

why did the onion fall out of the bag? ...there was a hole in the bag so the onion fell out

Do you know what is worse than getting kicked downstairs? Getting kicked upstairs because then you could fall downstairs and break your skull.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

What's wrong with the axe murderer that lives down the street?? Nothing.

what did bob say to joey, nothing joey's dead

Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

A horse walks into a bar. He was blind.

how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

so... how about that airplane food

Why are bowling balls racist? They are not because bowling balls are incapable of having feeling therfore they cannot have racial thoughts or actions.

well now

Why are pigs smelly ? Because a cucumber can't walk.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Gay's

Whats 2+1? 2.

Q. What do you call a deceased rodent A. Deadmau5

why was the man walking in the kitchen? idk thats why i asked

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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