A boy walks into a bar. Because he was under-age, security kicked him out as soon as possible and alerted his parents.

What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

Poop

Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

24

If the blue man lives in the blue house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The blue man. He has made a good living with a high salary and has enough money to afford two houses.

How do you annoy Lady Gaga? Stab her with a knife.

I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

What is worse than eating shoxy poulet.? Nothing

What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

Women's Rights.

A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

I am white, you are black, we can be friends, racism was abolished.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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