What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

I'm so hungry I could eat a well prepared meal!

what do you call an exited rectangle? an Erectangle

whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

whats super and the champions of europe? Leeds United

What's funnier then 24... The Holocost

What's the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies is a horrible tragedy.

Why are tests such a pain in the ass? Because your vomiting shit you'd learned the night before.

Whats faster than a black guy with a TV? His brother with a VCR.

Q: Why are lizards broke? A: Because they run around the desert with no money.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

What do Sylvia Plath and a cake have in common? Nothing.

People made fun of a plant for walking into a bar. Little did they know it hadn't been watered for days.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

why did the Chinese man fail the driving test because he had no previous driving experience and wasn't prepared for the test

My friend harris is fat.

Friends are like snow; they disappear when you pee on them.

women sports....

What KFC? Deep fried aborted babies.

Why did Hitler Kill his self Answer- He got a gas bill By Lewis

What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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