Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

A man walks into a bar. He has a beer and then goes home.

Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Did you hear the joke about Hellen Keller? Neither did she.

4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

Where did Susie go when her town was bombed? Everywhere.

one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

What do you get when you put a pig in an oven? A dead pig.

What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

a jewish man with a boner walks into a wall what does he hit first his cheek due to the fact he was looking at an attractive woman

Why doesn't it rain on Sundays? It does.

How do you disprove feminism? This is how I disprove feminism. I go up to a feminist and ask her, 'If there are penises, then why are there women?' I have never met a feminist who can say anything in response to my logic.

Is it true that curiousity killed the cat? No, I hit it multiple times with a baseball bat

How did the fat guy servive the plane crash??????? He bounced

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A man with a mustache enters your parents home to tell them you were kidnapped and taken to the pier 1 hour away. They leave and he goes upstairs to rape you for 1 hour. Never trust people with mustaches.

Why are butt pirates butt pirates? Because they just ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR FRUITS

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

A monkey walks into a bar. Monkeys are always funny.

canadians

Where do 5 gay guys go????? One Direction.

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

Your mother is so fat she has trouble finding clothes in her size.

Q:How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: Well, we can solve this problem of the wood chuck chucking our wood by putting all of your spare wood in a wood chipper. Try throwing dust you chucking bastard.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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