knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

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What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

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Why did the boy commit scuicide? Because he was mentaly scared due to constant tormenting and teasing from his friends

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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I'm a fork. Fork you!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cher. Cher who? Just Cher.

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What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

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What did the lady with Alzheimer's do yesterday She can't remember

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When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

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How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

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Guy 1: why are you such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most p***y

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a structure used to support sitting people, the other is a human being native to Mexico.

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A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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the fat boy named biggins ate a twinkie, a man named scruffy came along and shot biggins, now biggins has no nose

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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why didnt Joe drive the tractor today? Because Joe doesnt have any arms or legs. Why doesnt Joe have any arms or legs? A) Because Joe is a potatoe

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Two men walk into a bar. You would think at least one of them would've seen it.

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roses are red violets are too im bleeding

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

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What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops