Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

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What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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2 big black men walked up to me with baseball bats. they politely asked me if i wanted to join their friendly game of baseball

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

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Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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why did the chicken go to the man? TO ask if he wants sex for money

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Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting shot in the knee several times and bleeding to a slow and painful death.

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whoever just posted that stupid yo mama crap answer my comment

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Why did the beaver cross the road? To meet Justin Bieber!

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What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

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I have a black guy on my family tree. He's my cousin.

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

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Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

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-knock knock! -doors open

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do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

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If it wasn't for my horse I'd never go to college.

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops