What's worse than getting a flat tire on a date? getting one while rushing your dying grandfather to the hospital.

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat off, and the barman chuckles.

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Me- hey hitler you lost soemthing. hitler- Vat? Me-world war two.

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What happened to the orphan when it walked to the park? He found his birth parents........but then they were killed by a crazy hobo and he was taken away and molested

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? I like Pie. I like Pie who? What do you mean who? Pie isn't a person, it's a thing.

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Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

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Knock knock Who's there Boo Boo who DONT BE SUCH A PUS*Y

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What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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Wigan.

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What did the man say after being hit by a bus? Nothing he is now dead.

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Whats the difference between a horse and a snake? A snake is poisons, a horse is not.

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What's the difference between an eight year old girl and a Jew? Only one comes back from camp.

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"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

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What's more fun than thumbing down a shit joke? Thumbing down a shit joke which is neutral previous to your disliking giving it a little negative number.

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What do you get when you cross a Poodle with a cupcake? Stop looking at these anti-jokes and get back to work.

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Are you Jamaican? Because your dreadlocked hair is an iconic symbol of one who would be from the country of Jamaica.

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What should'nt you say to a rape victim. Rape.

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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why did the boy fall off his bike? someone threw a fridge at him

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What happens when a guy walk into a school and shoots kids? Oh sorry, to soon?

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You are walking down the street, and a man keeps on getting in your way. You want to politely... Screw it already and stab him in the back

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Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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Why did the Dentist recommend Oral B? He had been paid by the company and thus legally bound to do so.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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