Why did Colnel Sanders cross the road? Colnel Ryan Sanders crossed the road to attack Taliban fighters who were endangering his military presence.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is yellow and corny? Corn.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Do you like apples? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a bar The bar now has a hole in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Did you hear about the absent minded professor that tried to change the tire on his pickup truck? He forgot to lock the jack and the truck crushed his head like and egg shell.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you all a dead black man? A corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The Rock: What is your name? Jeff: My name is... The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A coach and a priest walk into a boys and girls club and kick out all the girls.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

U mad?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

children burning

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The real reason you go to college is.... To learn more about what you want to do in life.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the bus crash? What, you were expecting an answer? I was asking you

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops