I'm a lion hear my threat **** you ***** and then go **** yourself. if your scared and you know it and you really want to show it crap your pants.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

What do you do on Mother's Day? This is not a joke, I don't know what to do.

Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

How can you tell the person who stole your car was black? Stereotyping is wrong.

How did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it died. how did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the other monkey.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

What's the difference between your mother and a prostitute? Nothing.

what happen to covietz when he licked his balls? nothing he likes the taste

NASCAR

Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

the danced cus they were young, they danced cus they were free, but mostly the danced cus they needed to pee

Do you like impressions? Why? That's Socrates

A guy walks into a restaurant. "What would you like?" says the waiter. "A glass of orange juice," replies the man.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

Why couldn't the mexican get a job? He was seven.

What's worse than finding a holocost in your apple. A truck full of dead babies then what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babies in your apple. Braving to pich fork them out

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms

who wants to hear a joke about the broken pencil? to late, its sharpened

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Dyeing of cancer.

what do you get when you mix a shit zoo and a pitbull......"bull shit" oh this joke sucks well my life is over

Why did the black guy still have price tags on his clothes? He forgot to take them off.

I honestly have no idea what is upsetting you, why would I lie about my name? Please don't leave, you do remember me don't you? Can I call you over?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...