"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

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wat is the difference between rainbows and poop? I LOVE RAINBOWS!

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Why do all black people look the same? They don't you're just racist.

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How did the child cross the road? He couldn't his legs had been lost in an awful car accident that had killed his whole family.

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How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was an object of great appeal to him on the other side.

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There once was an X from place B, Who satisfied predicate P, Then X did thing A, In a specified way, Resulting in circumstance C.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This is a Poem, your Adopted

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Yo momma so fat, she has large amount of fat deposited in her body

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Your mom is like a tire iron: she's a whore

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Why did Helen Kelley's dog run away I'd run away to if my name was. Ughgughgughgiggughfufh.

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Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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A nig-ger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nig-gers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nig-ger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nig-ger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nig-ger, go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nig-ger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nig-ger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nig-gers, smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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Q: You know what you should add to your recipe? A: No, not really. Tell me. Q: What? Are you expecting an answer now? Why don't you just shoot me, huh?! Pee on my clothes and set them on fire! You racist son of an **orange**.... It certainly tastes better with oranges.

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Catholicism.

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When life throws knives at you, run away.

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What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

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The Detroit Lions

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Why did the kid get out of school at twelve? He left early with a stomach ache

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Why didn't the Irishman want to drink anymore? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

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this is not a joke. jks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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