yo' momma's so fat that when she saw a doctor he told her that she was overweight.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Whats an Anti Joke

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why wasn't the clown funny? He didn't have a face

thumb_up thumb_down +49

"Penis, penis, penis..." says Chase. That is all he likes and he fondles horse testes.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Little Davie was a kid with no arms and legs and one day his friends Came to his house and knocked on the door and asked for little Davie And asked if he wanted to come play baseball..Little Davie replied "I'd Love to but I have no arms or legs" his friends say we know that..We were Just needing a second base..

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the murderer get for Christmas? Executed.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Yo mama is so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing? Her reply was: Kicking a can down the street. What did you think she was doing? Moving?

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz he does what he wants.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a young child being beating to death with a spiked club? Arousing.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

I like pancakes. I like pancakes. We have no pancakes

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

what are the three types of rings? -wedding ring -engagement ring -suffering

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Knock Knock Nobody answered because the people in the house were away.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the wealthy black man shoplift from the convenience store? He is a kleptomaniac.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf a bread

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool The tragic drowning of a quadrapalegic

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops