What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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so there was two ducks in a bathtub. one duck says to the other duck, "hey, can you pass me the soap? the other duck says no.

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what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

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a horse nibbled a baby

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What color is red paint? Red

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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Knock knock Who's there? Your brother My brother who? The dead guy over there.

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I dont hate you Lets just say if you were on fire and i had water id drink it

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? Because she was shot in the face by a lone gunman.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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What is green fuzzy and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

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What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, there is no way to accurately estimate this number being that 1.woodchucks in fact do not chuck wood and 2. there is no time frame given for said action to take place

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A black guy and a mexican guy are in a car, Who's driving. A policeman.

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Whats worse than an oompa loompa a black midget

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TIMMAH!

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Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

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What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

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9

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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