Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot.

Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

What do you call an Indian cook, that cooks in a Chinese restaurant? A chef

i like cats

a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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