What do you call a cow that went through a earth quake? A dead cow.

A child is watching Saturday cartoons when is father walks in and, the child is aware that the father was on an all night binge and is verbally abused

My kids are mistakes.

What does Spiderman do everyday? Aunt May

What do you call a black priest? A black priest

So a baby seal walks into a club...

When I walk in the rain, I get wet

What did the munchy alzhemiers farmer say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators?

A cannibal went for a walk and he passed his brother.

A: Who keeps knocking on the wall? B: My neighbors have sex a lot. A: We should knock back.

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

So in Jimmy's school if u are misbehaving u are asked to get out of the room. Jimmy was in science, and he was throwing paper a bunch. Then his science teacher says, "Jimmy, do u wanna go out?" Jimmy replies "No thanks, I'm 14 and i have a girlfriend." That's how Jimmy got detention.

What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

What do you call a deaf, blind socialist? Helen Keller.

Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

What did the guy and girl do at the wedding? Nothing, The guy is gay

Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

Q. Knock knock A. Who's there Q. DEEZ A. DEEZ who A. DEEZ NUTZ HA GOT EEEEEM

a man walks into a prostitute.

Why didn't the man have a vagina? Trick Question. Everybody has a vagina.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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