A man walks into a bar.

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Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

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Bloody kids ...

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A tree walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the log face?".

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Some blind tall guy asked a rich dude about time when the rich dude looked at his klock he remembred many things in his ugly terrible life so he said to the blind guy : its 5PM

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he was stupid.

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A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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Why do penguins wash their clothes in tide? They don't. As artic-dwelling birds, they don't have access TV or magazines and as such, are impervious to influences via commercials and written advertisements. Also, obvious tuxedo jokes aside, they don't really wear clothes.

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She said no

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Teacher: "What is the outside layer on a tree?" Dog: "Bark" Teacher: "How would you describe the desert surface?" Dog: "Rough" Teacher: "Would you say that Abraham Lincoln was an intelligent man?" Dog: "Yarp"

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What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

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Once upon a time, there was a horse that had no legs, it laid on the ground it's entire life and died. The end.

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how do you make time fly? throw a clock out a window.

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How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A bag of burning crap.

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There is a blonde a Burnett and a red head. Life goes on.

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WNBA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a truck.

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what did the therapist say to the other therapist? WE'VE SAID THIS WAY TOO MANY TIMES YOU SHIT

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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