Why did the boy fall off his bike? He saw and ice cream truck across the street and rode towards it as fast as he could, sadly it was rush hour and he was hit by a speeding ambulance because he forgot to look both ways.

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What if Chuck Norris got shot by a bullet? The most interesting man in the world would save him.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

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I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call "Bob the Builder" when he retires Bob

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im dylan, i wank over teabaging people on cod

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What do you call a teacher that gets wasted? A wasted teacher.

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Women's rights.

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What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

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Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

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Did you hear Whitney Houston died? Yes.

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Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

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I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

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What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

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If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

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How do you make a builder sad? You shit on his bricks.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

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I have read and agree to terms of service.

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The racist uncle went to attend his nieces bat-mitzvah. Although he is racist, he is smart enough to not speak his mind, for he is in a temple, and may offend many people at the service.

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What do you call a red sore on your genitals? Herpes, probably.

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Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

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what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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