Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I think I may be colorblind.

-What did the gay guy say in Mcdonald's? -Ill have a number 10, with hot sauce and a large coke.

what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

Why did the sixteen year old girl get an abortion? She didn't want the responsibility of raising a child

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Tulips are red, And my garden is red. OMG...MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE

Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

Why was the farmer buried in a grave on the top of a hill? He had died and this would be his final resting place.

A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

noodles

did you know the leading cause of funerals is death?

Yo mamas so fat, that she brought a spoon to the super bowl!

What is white on the top and black on the bottom? Society

What smells worse than an old women's fart? the rotting carcus of a dead baby

A black man, a mexican man and a chinese man all walk into a supermarket. Together, they purchase ingredients to make a delicious vegetarian lasagna. That night, they make the lasagna and greatly enjoy it together.

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

What's worse then listening to Nickleback? The Holo- On second thought, nothing.

Why did Sally go to McDonalds? Because she felt like it

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

What do you get when an Alabama and an LSU kid are mixed?A small child who grows up in a world of fighting and domestic violence.

Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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